BMX XXX sounds like a terrible idea on paper. It’s technically a perversion of the Dave Mirra Freestyle BMX series, which itself is a perversion of Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater. Acclaim decided that they weren’t making enough money on their “sort of okay” series, so they decided to add the only thing that could possibly bring them more attention: tits. BMX is, after all, the most erotic of sports. It basically boils down to a lot of straddling in fancy and inventive ways.

I like breasts as much as the next woman, but this came out while I was in high school, and even then it sounded like a cynical attempt to make sales with controversy. Of course, this was also at a time when I was trying to maintain the illusion that I wasn’t interested in flesh of any kind, so I would have passed it up anyway so that no one would discover my dark secret.

Now I’m an adult and I can explore my interests without having to worry about getting “the talk” from my parents. So, I’m going to take this game — one that I’m probably going to hate — and see how long it takes me to see a nipple. That is, after all, the main bullet point of this game. Also, I don’t count nipples that are visible through tops. You don’t get bonus points just because you don’t wear a bra.

Join me on my quest to see nipples in BMX XXX screenshot

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Source: Destructoid Join me on my quest to see nipples in BMX XXX